“Across the street from Disney Hall, shiny as the crooked grin on the mug of a gin-sozzled dame, First & Hope is a maximalist’s cool evening out, a restaurant-slash–supper club with a Blue Velvety jazz lounge at its heart, a bar that splits the difference between Busby Berkeley glitz and downtown disco cool, bathed in a purplish glow that recalls the shimmer of footlights reflected in a tight, sequined dress. Does the Flash-intensive Web site give the costume designer and the bartender as much play as it does the chef? It does. Is the menu of proto-Southern tavern food programmed as carefully as a Golden Globes acceptance speech?”
-Jonathan Gold

Honestly, i’m all for one or two well designed artifices, but amidst the hyphens, dashes and  superfluous italicized phrases, this is just a jumble of obscurities. Haha. Let’s try and do 1st&Hope a favor and break this down.

‘shiny as the crooked grin on the mug of a gin-sozzled dame’

First off, sozzle (apparently) is the act of wetting or splashing about especially by a sluttish woman. And Dame carries the connotation of a women of “knightly ranking.” Contradiction? Possibly. Moving on. ‘Mug’ is probably referring to this whorey female knight’s face, and apparently she is wearing a crooked grin, I assume because of the gin. So, that being said, 1st&Hope is as “reflecting of light” as, this here described  woman’s, smile.

‘a bar that splits the difference between Busby Berkeley glitz and downtown disco cool’

Busby Berkeley was, via wikipedia, a musical choreographer/director in the 30’s, known for his geometric patterns and excessive use of showgirls in hiskaleidoscopic performances, most well known for his production, “Gold Diggers of 1933.” So, the bar at 1st&Hope -manned by Aidan Demarest -renders the effect of something that lands somewhere between that, and a disco. Sure paints a picture, don’t it? erh…

‘bathed in a purplish glow that recalls the shimmer of footlights reflected in a tight, sequined dress’

Apparently, this bar is also purple. But not just any purple. The same purple that is reminiscent of footlights -the lights that line the bottom of a stage- that are being manifested in some (dame’s?) dress. That, is lovely.

‘Is the menu of proto-Southern tavern food programmed as carefully as a Golden Globes acceptance speech?’

Finally, it seems that Mr.Gold feels as if the menu was put together with the same thought and detail as a carefully contrived acceptance speech given by a winner of the Hollywood Foreign Press Association’s most prestegious award.

Wow, what a mouth full, and that was the just the first paragraph. Jonathan, you are an amazing writer and I know it’s hard, but sometimes sacrificing logic and semantics for a bad ass sentence, just isn’t worth it. Kudos to 1st&Hope for such an exquisitely verbose review.

Jonathan Gold: Supper Hero